Literature of the Naive
by Corvin
Summary: Neji is doing his best to woo Gaara. But the redhead seems to becompletely clueless to his advances. See how Neji does his best to make itapparent that he is interested. NejiGaa, other pairings inside. AU Highschool
1. Chapter 1

1**An: This is a birthday fic for Darka-chan! YAY! EVERYONE CHEER AND WISH HER A HAPPY B-DAY! WOOT!**

**Pairings: Neji/Gaara**

**One sided Naruto/Gaara**

**Sasuke/Naruto**

**Possible Orochimaru/Itachi... Not sure, I know there are Orochimaru haters out there. I can't help it, I love his creepy self. **

**XDD I fucked up before and forgot to put the pairings**

**((Begin Chapter))**

**oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo**

"So what do you think?"

Neji tilted his head to the side, carefully examining a redhead who was reading quietly under a tree by himself. "He's cute," He said finally, "I'll take him"

Itachi smirked, pleased with his successful suggestion, "Good. Although I'd be careful, there are rumors going around about him"

The other just smirked as well, "Are they any worse then the ones about you?"

"I guess that would be for the listener to decide once he heard them"

Neji raised an eyebrow, "So? Let me hear it"

"Some people are saying that he has a really bad temper and he hates being touched. The story goes that his principal at his last school grabbed his arm and that he just snapped at broke both the guy's legs and his right arm in three places" The Uchiha raised an eyebrow, "So... I would suggest maybe not touching him until you get to a basis where he says you can"

The Hyuuga only snorted, "That's assault brotha'," He said, "Why would they just send him to another school? Shouldn't he be in juvi?"

"Nope," Said Itachi, "Apparently he's the kazekage's son. Diplomatic immunity, the law can't touch him"

"I see," Said Neji with a small laugh, "Ah, the way foreign powers can go commit felonies in other countries! Beautiful isn't it?"

Itachi just smirked again, "Does that mean you're out?"

The brunette looked at the redhead again and smiled, "Most certainly not"

"Then make me proud!"

"Don't I always?"

**000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000**

Gaara blinked though his face remained passive. There was something in his light. He looked up at a boy standing over him, "Yes?"

"Hi," He said, "My name is Hyuuga Neji"

Gaara stared at him, "Ok" He went back to reading, or at least he tried, "You're in my light"

Neji said an apology and sat down beside him. The redhead closed his book with a sigh, "Did you want something?"

Neji smiled, "Well, I was hoping to get your name"

"Gaara"

"Gaara..." the Hyuuga said, "I like it. It's kind of cute"

The redhead blinked again, then shook his head, "If you say so"

"I do. So, how come you're over here by yourself?"

"I hate people"

"You seem pretty nice to me"

He turned to the brunette and glared icily, "You don't know me" He was satisfied when the other shivered, however it was short lived when the charming smile returned.

"Feisty," he said, "I like that"

Gaara frowned, 'The hell is he talking about? Is he high?', "You're very odd, go away"

Neji smiled and leaned closer, still avoiding touching the redhead, just in case the rumors were true, "I will for now. But I have to say, when I see something I like, I have a hard time keeping my hands to myself" With that he stood up and walked away.

Gaara blinked again, then shook his head and opened his book to resume reading, "Why the hell would I care?"

**000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000**

"What do you mean you don't think he got it?"

Neji scowled, "I mean I think he thought I was just trying to make friends"

"..." The Uchiha stared at him, "You mean... He didn't notice he was getting hit on?"

"... Yeah"

Itachi began to laugh hysterically, almost scaring his friend, who like everyone else, was used to an Itachi more composed than himself. After a moment he recovered and treated his friend with an angry glare, "What's so funny?"

"You! I mean, I guess you were kind of losing your touch, but for someone to be completely clueless!" He began to chuckle again.

"I'm telling you! This guy has to be the most naive person on earth!... AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'LOSING MY TOUCH'!"

Itachi just sighed. They were standing in the parking lot, ignoring the fact that school had been out for half an hour. The two had met up after their sixth period had began to converse about what happened at lunch. He sighed, "Try getting him flowers or something"

Neji raised an eyebrow, "He doesn't seem like the flower type"

"... True"

"God!" Exclaimed the Hyuuga, "This would be easier if I could just grope him or something"

"Do you want to take that chance?"

"... I can try again tomorrow"

"Cool, let's go to the library, I want a sex ed book to put under Sasuke's pillow"

"Fine, I need to return something anyway"

**000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000**

"Hey GAARAAA!"

The redhead flinched as he was glomped from behind. He was turned around and faced a grinning blond haired, blue eyed boy he had known for a about three weeks. His mouth twitched and suddenly the blond was on the ground, holding his nose in pain, "OW! What was that for!"

"What did I say about touching me, Uzamaki"

Naruto pouted, still rubbing his sore face, "You didn't have to hit me"

"No, I could have done far worse"

The boy flinched, but stood up, losing his pout, "So what are you doing today?" He asked wiggling his eyebrows, "I was thinking we could go somewhere..."

"No thanks," murmured Gaara heading towards the library, "I'm going to study"

"Maah! But why Gaara! I want to go on a date!"

"I don't"

Naruto followed the redhead up the large steps and into the large brick building, still complaining. Gaara ignored him, though the blond was earning various dirty looks from the other patrons. "Come on Gaara! We can go to the movies! My treat!"

"No"

"You know you want to"

"As if I would deny myself anything I wanted"

"You're just playing hard to get!"

"I am hard to get"

He stopped at a book shelf and began scanning the titles, momentarily tuning out the loud mouthed Uzamaki. He found his book and pulled it off the shelf, before turning to Naruto, "Are you getting a book?"

"No. Why are you? Didn't you just get one?"

"I finished it"

Naruto gaped at him, "You only got it yesterday!" They were met with angry shushing, but Gaara just shrugged, "It was a page turner"

"... Lolita was a page turner?"

"It was a very good book"

"Tch, whatever. What are you getting now?"

"Dante's Inferno"

"... You're weird... But I like it! Let me take you to a movie!"

"No"

Gaara went to the librarian and pulled out his library card. It wasn't really necessary though, he knew him by name. He had been getting books for about eight years and was usually in here at least three or four times a week. He smiled kindly and checked out the book, "Finished Lolita already have you?"

The Sabaku looked up at the brunette man, who had been working there as long as he had been going. He gave a small nod, "Vladimir Nabokov did an excellent job," he replied, "Have you read it, Umino?"

"Of course," said Iruka, "Though I can't say I'm a fan of such tragedy"

"It wasn't tragedy just because she died"

Iruka chuckled, "I guess that depends... Dante's Inferno? Very nice choice"

"Hey!" Said Naruto, making himself known, "Don't try to steal him away Iruka!"

The brunette blushed but shook his head, "Of course not Naruto"

Gaara smirked, "So, do you have any good ABC books for the genius here?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Exactly how it sounds"

"Alright," said Iruka, "No fighting in the library. This is a place for reading"

"Yeah, yeah" Muttered Naruto, while Gaara calmly left. He followed after him, still complaining, "You read too much Gaara!"

"I read exactly the right amount"

"No, Ack!"

Naruto was cut short by someone running into him and causing him to fall onto the ground. Gaara didn't spare the blond a glance, but looked at the two people about to enter the library. Neji looked back at him, his face going from blankly annoyed to curious. "Gaara?"

"..." The redhead showed no signs of recognition.

"I met you earlier... At school"

Itachi started to snicker as Gaara stared at his friend blankly, no one paid any attention to Naruto who was yelling at the Uchiha to watch where he was going. Neji frowned, "Ok..." He thought for a moment, "Can you wait a second? I need to return a book and he," he gestured to Itachi, "Needs to get something. It shouldn't take too long"

"What book?"

"Hm?"

Gaara tilted his head to the side, eyeing the book in Neji's hand, "Is that Dante's Inferno?"

"Yeah"

"... How was it?"

"Awesome. Just wait till they get the fourth circle of Hell and see Plutus"

Naruto frowned and looked at Gaara who had started to flip through his book, "What the fuck is that book about!"

"It's a story about Dante's journey to find God. He passes through Hell and Purgatory and Paradise..." Neji smiled and inched closer to Gaara and flashed a smile, "It's really good"

"Hn," said Gaara putting his book down, "And here I thought you were some drugged up idiot with no taste"

Itachi snorted, "Drugged up?"

"You should have heard the weird shit he was saying"

"... Right" Mumbled Neji, "Well, we have to hurry, don't even bother about waiting"

"We won't!" Yelled Naruto finally squeezing into the conversation, "So you guys can leave now!" He did not like how much attention this guy was paying to Gaara.

Itachi raised an eyebrow at the boy and the Hyuuga frowned, "Whatever" He looked at the Uchiha, "There's a reading at Camille's tonight, I want to go" They started walking, seemingly forgetting the blond and the redhead.

"Sure, what are they reading?"

"Pale Fire by Vladimir Nabovok"

"Oh, is that the one where it spells out a message in the final paragraph?"

"What? No! That's the Vane Sisters. Pale Fire is the one from 1962..." The rest of their conversation was cut off by the closing of the library doors.

Gaara paused for a moment, than started walking. Naruto followed after him, "Who was that? What the hell was his problem? So what do you say Gaara? Doing anything later? Come on, lets go somewhere"

The redhead continued his way down the street, not even looking back, "That was some guy from earlier. I'm still convinced he's on drugs... I'm doing something already, that reading sounded good"

**00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000**

Itachi smirked at Iruka who was blushing slightly at the book he had gotten, 'The joy of sex'. Sasuke was going to flip, why was he so mean to his younger brother? Oh yeah, because it was funny. "So it didn't seem like you were flirting that much," He said off handedly, "Maybe you are losing your touch. I mean seriously, talking about books?"

Neji glared at him, "That wasn't what I was doing to before," he growled, "stop saying I'm losing my touch... And some people like to read and increase their intelligence!"

"I'm intelligent"

"You can be..."

"Whatever. Hey, what you got there?"

"Petersburg"

Itachi sighed, "You and your Russians.. So, you think he'll be there?"

The brunette held the door open for his friend as he thought this over, "... Yeah, I think so"

**00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000**

**((End Chapter))**

**XD Had to get this started for Darka's b-day. It was like, on the 18th and I'm just now finishing the first chapter. :P Yes I am slow. XD **

**OKIES! Sorry bout all the literature talk, but I couldn't help it. I am reading books by peoples for inspiration! BECAUSE I WANT TO BE A GREAT WRITER SOME DAY! LIKE NABOKOV, PROUDST AND BELY! YAAY! XD ok right, umm... Yeah.**


	2. Chapter 2

Corvin: Sorry if this chapter is bland. I have been struggling with the second chapter to this fic, FOREVER. So I finally just decided to write it and post it. Deal with it.

Kyo: Corvin does not own Naruto

Botan: And this chapter is not betaed

* * *

Neji, Itachi and Sasuke sat at the table, each in his own thoughts, all three waiting for the reading to begin. Sasuke twitched slightly and glared at his older brother for the millionth time that night.

Itachi only smirked, "What is it little brother? Learn something new today?"

"I hate you"

The older Uchiha only smirked and looked at Neji, "Any sign off him?"

Neji looked up from his book, "Nope"

"Are you looking?"

"… Yeah"

Sasuke growled as a grating, irritating voice met his ears, "HEY LOOK! TEME'S HERE!!"

The group looked over to see Naruto and Gaara approaching them. Neji smirked and closed his book. He kicked the chair next to him out and Gaara sat down.

Naruto pouted as there wasn't a seat next to the redhead and settled between Sasuke and Itachi. He glared at the Hyuuga, who had begun to try and make conversation with Gaara.

"Hello Gaara, how are you?"

Gaara looked at him, "When does the reading start?"

"… In about ten minutes" Said Neji, checking his watch, "Do you want something to drink?"

"No"

"…" Neji twitched slightly and glared at Itachi who had pressed his lips into a thin line, trying to repress a laugh.

Naruto sighed and leaned back, looking around at all the people whom he had deemed dull, "So what's so great about this book? Gaara said it was a 99 line poem that sounds dumb"

Neji glared at him, "Some find it beautiful"

The Uzumaki glared right back, "What about you?" He sneered, "Will you be moved to tears?"

"Beauty of whatever kind, in its supreme development, invariably excites the sensitive soul to tears" Said Itachi trying to get them to shut up.

Neji smiled at him and a voice said, "Poe, nice"

They looked up at an ashen white man with narrow golden eyes. He smiled and gave a small bow of his head, "Sorry if I am interrupting. But it seems so rare to find young people who know anything of good literature now a day"

"True," Said Neji, "Impress us and you may sit with us"

"An open mind, in questions that are not ultimate, is useful. But an open mind about the ultimate foundations either of Theoretical or of Practical Reason is idiocy."

Neji fell silent; a small frown creased his brow. Gaara could tell he was trying to figure out who it was, because he was trying to as well.

"C.S. Lewis" Said Itachi, "Interesting, please, pull up a chair"

The man did so and introduced himself, "My name is Orochimaru"

"I am Itachi that is Neji, this is my younger brother Sasuke, there is Gaara and some kid"

"I'M NARUTO!"

Orochimaru nodded to them and Itachi said, "Anything else?"

"Hm?"

"Would you care to share of anything else? Dazzle us once more, or are you a parrot who can only repeat certain phrases without knowing their meaning?"

Orochimaru smirked at the challenge, "Give me an author"

"Dante Alighieri" Said Gaara looking down at his book, "If you can"

"Fame is not won on downy plumes nor under canopies; the man who consumes his days without obtaining it leaves such mark of himself on earth as smoke in air or foam on water" Orochimaru leaned back, "Meaning, a man who wastes his life rather than attempt something spectacular will never be remembered"

"You seem to know great writers well" Marveled Sasuke, although he was more a fan of the films.

"I should hope so," Said Orochimaru, "I am a professor of Great Literature and Writers at the local college"

Neji snorted, "That's cute, what are you, twenty five?"

The man only stared at him, "… I'm thirty six"

There was an awkward silence as everyone digested that he was serious.

"… Do I look twenty five?" He asked idly brushing some black hair away from his face.

A waitress approached, "Hi there, what can I get for you?"

As everyone ordered Gaara opened his book and began to read. After a few moments he twitched, "Naruto, you have two seconds"

The foot that was rubbing against his leg immediately jerked back. The redhead scooted a bit closer to Neji, hoping to confuse the blond with too many legs if he tried playing footsie again.

The blond noticed this and looked at Neji, "So, Hyuuga-"

He was cut off by several shushes as the lights darkened and a spotlight appeared on the small stage.

A man walked up with a book and began to read.

Neji leaned back in his chair, glancing over at the redhead with a small smirk. He slowly stretched and began to lower his arm around the boy's shoulders when suddenly Sasuke stood abruptly, "WHAT THE HELL!"

He glared heatedly at the blond who was looking at him confused and turned and stormed out.

Itachi looked at Naruto with a raised eyebrow and he received a sheepish look that ended with the blond looking down, obviously embarrassed. Neji withdrew his arm, noticing more than the chuckling Orochimaru and Itachi, the silent glares they were getting from the others in the room, including the brunette who had been trying to read the book.

After a moment he began to read again and everyone turned back to the stage. Neji raised an eyebrow when Itachi whispered something into Naruto's ear. After a moment the Uzumaki muttered a 'fine' and stood up, walking in the direction Sasuke had left.

Neji smirked, the nuisance was gone, and he stretched again and lowered his arm around Gaara's shoulder. The redhead didn't seem to notice but only shifted closer so Neji's arm wasn't uncomfortably stretched.

The man read about sixty two lines before the lights went back up. Gaara noticed Neji's arm and shoved it off, "Stop wallowing, we weren't sitting there _that _long"

Neji blinked and Itachi started laughing again. They all stood up and Orochimaru coughed a little into his hand (Corvin: I made him do that because I coughed just now), "Well, it was nice to meet you all"

"You too," Said Itachi shaking the hand he hadn't coughed into, "When I go to college I'll be sure to take your class"

The man blinked, "How old are you?"

"17"

Orochimaru blinked, "That's young. Now I'm _really _impressed by your literary knowledge"

The Uchiha smirked, "Why thank you. To be honest its Neji's fault"

"He does drugs" Said Gaara cutting in for the Hell of it.

Orochimaru laughed, "Hugs _and _drugs eh?" He shot Neji a false scolding look, "I can't say I approve"

Neji scowled and blew a short raspberry, "Screw you guys, I'm going home" He looked at Gaara and smirked, "Can I drive you?"

The redhead frowned at him, he had taken his book out and had been peacefully reading it again, "Drive me where?"

"… Home"

"Fine" Gaara marked his page and closed his book. He frowned again, looking around, "Where is Naruto?"

"And Sasuke" Said Itachi who had just been asking Orochimaru if he cared to stay behind for some coffee. The group looked around the room, seeing no sign of the blond or the Uchiha they ventured outside. Gaara shook his head, "Figures"

Naruto and Sasuke were sitting on the front steps, yelling loudly about something, until Naruto noticed them. He stood up and was immediately at Gaara's side "Hey Gaara," He grinned, beginning to slip an arm around the redhead, before stopping when he received a glare, "How was it?"

"The Asshole took too many breaks"

Neji clicked his tongue, "Give him some slack, some people wouldn't stop talking"

Itachi looked at his younger brother who had stood up as well, "Having a sexy talk were you?"

Sasuke snorted, "Hardly. That moron claims Pirates of the Caribbean was better than Taxi Driver!"

Itachi and Neji turned slowly to wish death upon the blond, who in turn glared at the younger Uchiha, "that's because it is!!"

"You've never even seen Taxi Driver! 'Pirates of the Caribbean' was over-rated for all the wrong reasons! It's a history killing farce of fantasy!"

"Here, here" Muttered Gaara not looking up from his book.

Orochimaru began to laugh again and Neji couldn't help but notice it sounded a little creepy, "A film enthusiast? You bunch are a group of intellectuals"

Naruto frowned at Sasuke and at Gaara for agreeing with him. Neji tugged lightly on Gaara's arm, "Come on, I'll take you home"

The redhead barely glanced at him and nodded. Naruto gasped, "Why didn't you hit him?! You always hit me for touching you!!"

The Sabaku shrugged and only followed Neji away, as the Hyuuga threw a superior smirk over his shoulder at the blond.

"Sasuke, take the loudmouth home, I'm going to stay a while longer" Said Itachi and he and Orochimaru went back inside.

The younger Uchiha and the Uzumaki glared at each other, but started walking silently.

* * *

Neji kept glancing over at the still reading redhead, wondering how to go about this, "Where are you to?"

"Fifth circle"

"Already?"

"Yeah"

Neji frowned ahead at the road; that was hardly hitting on someone. Hmmm, "You look hot tonight"

Gaara shrugged, "Not really, if anything it was a little cold"

The poor brunette felt like hitting his head on the steering wheel, "I mean... Good. You looked good"

"Yeah, I feel fine"

Neji twitched, "Attractive"

Gaara looked at him, "… Are you doing the marijuana?"

"No!" He scowled, "Look, I've been thinking… We could like, go find, or do maybe, like-"

"You want me to teach you English?"

"Yeah we can squeeze that in" Neji sighed, "Where exactly do you live?"

"You're driving in the opposite direction" Gaara had begun to read his book again, "My address is 8374 Cobble Creek, figure it out"

Neji pulled into a drive way and turned around, "Ok…" He began to run through his thoughts, what was the next thing he had planned?

"So, are you interested in going to a fair?"

"No"

"Let me finish"

"No"

Neji frowned, "It's like a Ren-faire"

Gaara looked up at him finally, "What's that?"

"A Renaissance Faire; but that's not exactly what it is. It's the Middle Earth Festival" Neji smirked realizing that he caught the redhead's interest.

"Middle Earth… Like Lord of the Rings?"

"Sort of. It's pretty much just like a Renaissance Faire, only there's more fantasy mixed into it. Itachi, Sasuke and I go to every single one of that we can make it to" He turned seeing 'Cobble Creek' on a sign and said, "It's really fun, plus you don't have to pay"

Gaara paused and closed his book and Neji pulled to a stop in front of the house with the numbers '8374' on the front, "Do I have to dress up?"

The Hyuuga looked at him hopefully, "No, Sasuke doesn't always dress up"

"You do?"

He frowned "Yes, I always go as an elf"

The redhead eyed him and then shrugged, "Sure why not, I have nothing better to do, maybe I'll dress up"

Neji smiled as the redhead got out of the car and slammed the door shut. Once he was inside the Hyuuga pulled away from the curb. He had been driving for five minutes when the vibrating of his phone caught his attention. He pulled it out of his pocket and looked down at the ID:

_Uchiha(Home)_

He raised an eyebrow and flipped the phone open, "Got home already?"

"Dude," Said Itachi, "I want to bone him"

Neji sighed and shook his head.

* * *

Corvin: He's talking about Orochimaru BTW

Kyo: Now review! Or she'll never update anything ever again! O.O

Corvin&Botan/\ /\;;;


	3. Chapter 3

Corvin: Be gentle Chiccies this is an unbetaed interlude chapter

Kyo: We disclaim

* * *

Neji slammed his locker shut as his 'dear friend' Itachi continued to ramble how he had lost his touch and how he would never get to bone a certain redhead. Honestly, life was plenty stressful in that moment without the damn Uchiha rubbing it in his face that he was apparently, very bad at flirting.

"Orochimaru said he thought it was obvious, but I think he was just trying to cut you some slack. And then of course I get home and Sasuke is on the phone with that Uzumaki kid who apparently called him to argue that some movie called 'Shawshank Redemption' was overrated and Sasuke was yelling… Do you think Orochimaru would stay over at my house this weekend?"

Neji raised an eyebrow, "If he's over 30 I would think he has his own place"

"This is true… How should I broach such a delicate subject?"

Neji began walking to his next class, his chemistry book nestled safely under his arm, "Asking him to screw?"

"Yeah"

The Hyuuga sighed, "Since when do you care what I think? Aren't I 'losing my touch'?"

Itachi did not pout, though Neji could hear it in the boy's voice as he spoke, "Actually I just think that Gaara is an R-tard, you're pretty blatant; it's just funny to get on your case. But no, what should I do?"

"I don't know, did you invite him to the Middle Earth Festival?"

"Yeah, he said he'd go if he could make it, but he'd be a little late because he has a lecture" Itachi stared ahead of him blankly, seemingly back to himself, "I suppose such things can't be helped"

Neji only shook his head as they entered the classroom, "He's old enough to be your dad, doesn't that bother you?"

"No, he looks younger than he really is," Said Itachi sitting down calmly next to his little brother who was staring at the two incredulously, "Besides; shouldn't you be worrying about your own problem? Redhead doesn't seem interested in you at all"

"You're the one who brought up your problems," Growled Neji, setting his book down on the desk and picking up a piece of chalk, "No be quiet or I'll give you detention!" He began to write a random name on the board.

"What are you doing now?" Hissed Sasuke to Itachi, "This is _my_ class"

"Now everyone, Ms. Kurenai is sick today, so I will be filling in for her, my name is Mr. Housemaster, sitting there next to the young Sasuke whom I have never met before is my teacher's aid, Joe"

Sasuke twitched and smirked as the rest of the class stared at the well known Hyuuga in confusion and amusement.

* * *

Neji's smirking had not subsided, despite the fact that he had gotten an earful from Kurenai and a Saturday school, he was proud of himself.

Sasuke on the other hand had no such pride in that moment and was therefore scowling in annoyance, "Is he done yet?"

It was lunch time, after the class that Neji and Itachi had infiltrated, and Sasuke and Neji were waiting outside the computer lab for Itachi, who was busily writing an email to Orochimaru, re-telling him all the basics of the Middle Earth Festival.

The Hyuuga shrugged, "I doubt it, why don't we just leave him for now?"

"So you can look for your would-be-boyfriend?"

The brunette raised an eyebrow at him, "I recall your brother telling me you were talking to the Uzumaki for a loooooong time last night…"

He grinned when Sasuke's eyes narrowed, "That moron purposefully looked up a great movie just so he could tell me it sucked! Pirates of the Caribbean? Good God! He probably just likes it because of that mediocre, no talent, average looking, overrated Johnny Depp!" (Corvin: That's right I said it, I went there, and I stand by it)

Neji chuckled, "Jealous much?"

Sasuke snorted, "Hardly, that dobe wouldn't know a good movie if it jumped up, bit him in the ass and then gave him an orgasm through prostate stimulation" (Corvin: Admittedly not mine T T)

Neji began to laugh as Itachi came out of the classroom, "What did I miss?"

They sauntered to a lower floor and then outside, where there were a few people playing basket ball, eating their lunch, or just chatting. However, in the shade of a tree sat a small figure, leaning over a book and ignoring a blond bouncing around it.

The Hyuuga scowled, "That kid is getting annoying…" he said, glaring at Naruto. Itachi looked as well and nodded, "Little brother, I have decided that you are going to steal his heart"

Sasuke jerked his head up, praying to the gods of hearing wrong that he had just heard wrong, "What?"

Itachi and Neji both looked at the younger Uchiha, "You are going to make blondie yours to get him out of Neji's way"

Sasuke looked at Neji, "Not to give you too much credit, but I think you already have more of a chance than the dobe"

Neji smirked, but Itachi said, "Not good enough, that kid is in the way, an inconvenience if you will. Now, go touch him inappropriately!"

"I don't know what's worse, doing drugs or circulating them"

The trio jumped and looked behind them to see Gaara and Naruto standing right there. The blond looked angry while the redhead stared at Neji, "You're taking me downtown to get a costume after school"

Neji raised an eyebrow, forgetting momentarily that he was supposed to be flirting, "Am I?"

"Yes"

"I will if you ask nicely"

"No, you're taking me and you're paying, because I don't have any money"

"Oh come on Gaara!" Cried Naruto throwing his hands up in the air, "You'll go on a date with him and not me?!?!" He then turned and glared at Neji who had just begun to see the Brightside of taking Gaara downtown, just the two of them, "I'm going too! I've got my eye on you"

After losing a glaring contest with his older brother, Sasuke sighed and took a step forward, punching Naruto slightly upside the head, "Dobe, you can come with me and Itachi"

Naruto clutched the back of his head, glaring daggers at the Uchiha, "Like Hell am I leaving Gaara to be raped by that loser!" He pointed to where he thought Neji was standing only to find the spot empty.

All three of them looked up to see Neji and Gaara headed back towards the tree.

* * *

Gaara sat down and looked at Neji, "You followed me"

"I figured we could talk," Said Neji, sitting closer than he had to, "You know… Get to know each other…"

"I'm reading"

Neji twitched, "… Can't you put the book down for two seconds?"

"No"

The Hyuuga twitched more visibly and noticed the cover, "That's not Dante's Inferno"

"No shit Sherlock"

Neji scowled and leaned closer and closer, until he was just barely resting his chin on the redhead's shoulder, "Then what is it?" He asked, making sure that his hot breath could be felt.

To his satisfaction he saw Goosebumps on the boy's skin and Gaara turned his head to face him. Neji was quite aware of the proximity, so much so that he didn't even notice the deadly glare on the boy's face.

Neji blinked, since when did Gaara look like tree branches? And since when did his face hurt? He blinked again, and since when did Gaara sit over looking as though he were about to kill? "Ow"

Gaara snorted, "Dude, personal space"

The Hyuuga bit back a groan and propped himself up on his elbows, looking at the redhead who was sitting next to his stomach, "That hurt"

"Then keep your distance next time"

Neji only rolled his eyes, "So what is that?"

Gaara looked down at his book, "The Aeneid, by Virgil"

"Virgil? As in 'Virgil' Virgil? Dante's guide through Hell?"

"Mmhmm, he was a poet a long time before Dante was born, this is his most famous poem"

Neji lie back down and put his hands behind his head, "Read me some?"

"Read some your-damn-self" Said Gaara opening the book back up and reclining slightly back on the Hyuuga's stomach.

"Come on, just a little"

"No"

"Fine" Neji continued to lay back on the grass, listening slightly to the sound of Sasuke and Itachi keeping Naruto from running over to them, enjoying the pressure of Gaara laying slightly against him and watching the tree branches sway in the breeze.

"…Nor thus confin'd, the yoke of sov'reign sway. Should on the necks of all the nations lay. She ponder'd this, and fear'd it was in fate; Nor could forget the war she wag'd of late  
For conqu'ring Greece against the Trojan state"

Eyes shut, Neji smiled softly as Naruto finally broke free of the Uchihas and dashed over to them, him being the only one who noticed Gaara's lingering gaze on the brunette's face.

* * *

Two hours after school found Itachi and Neji arguing over whether Gaara should be a ranger or a necromancer, Naruto and Sasuke were arguing over pirates or knights and Gaara quietly examining some cloaks.

"He's not going to be a necromancer! That's WAY too gothy and gay!" Growled Neji, hitting the face paint out of Itachi's hand, "He's a ranger!"

"Hehe, um no! Rangers suck! Their only good point is the pet, other than that they're useless"

"No, they aren't! Necromancers only have Life Sciphon and Bone Horror! Their spells suck! And guess what? They're practically useless with melee weapons!"

Sasuke had stopped yelling at Naruto to shake his head, "I can't believe you guys are actually having this conversation"

Gaara sauntered back over, holding a burgundy, velvet cloak, "I want this. I'm going to be a mage"

Neji looked at it, "How much?"

The redhead looked at the price tag and shrugged, "$79.99"

The Hyuuga glared at him, "I'm not buying that, they have shorter ones for half that price"

"Can it rich boy" Said Gaara walking over to the register, "Now get over here and buy me my stuff"

* * *

Corvin: Short yes, going to get over it? Yes : D

Kyo: Just a quick interlude correct?

Corvin: Indeed, the Middle Earth Festival I am attending isn't until April, which is what I was going to base the goings on of Gaara and Neji's experience on. This is to tide everyone over until then

Botan: Plus it's not like you have a shortage of shit you have to update

Corvin: Oh yeah? Well bone me!

Botan: … What?

Corvin: I mean, screw you

Kyo: Now I know who dad REALLY needs to teach English to

Corvin: Shut up


	4. Chapter 4

Corvin: Quick word of warning! I switch back and forth between using numbers and then spelling numbers out

Botan: Corvin does not own Naruto

* * *

Gaara sat down on the little bench provided in the makeshift dressing room. He stared hard at the overly large and billowy white shirt that Neji had been eyeing. 

He smirked to himself, of course after seeing the interest he had promptly taken it and walked to where he was now. The only problem was, he had no intention of trying it on. Oh well, he could comfortably sit in there until someone came looking for him.

Outside he heard Naruto and Sasuke arguing again and he rolled his eyes.

((Outside))

"I can't believe you would be so mean to someone just because they're dressed like Jack Sparrow!" Exclaimed Naruto after Sasuke verbally assaulted a man who had passed them.

The Uchiha glared at him, "this is a Middle Earth festival. There aren't any pirates in mother _fucking_ Middle Earth!"

"You're such a narrow minded asshole!" Cried Naruto, throwing his hands up in exasperation.

"You're a no minded, mudkipz loving perpetuator of fan girl faggotry!" Hissed Sasuke

"You can't go around insulting people!"

"Don't censor me!!"

"Holy crap guys!" Itachi stepped between the feuding duo, shoving them apart by their faces, "Shut up and enjoy Adam the Juggler or something!"

Ranger Sasuke glared at necromancer Itachi, "How about we leave the dobe to his own devices?"

"EMO!" Yelled Naruto before Itachi could respond

"SCENE KID!" retaliated Sasuke

"Alright those blows are low and uncalled for" Stated Itachi, pulling them into separate headlocks and dragging them away from the stall where Gaara was trying on a shirt and Neji was watching the two boys fight in amusement.

Sasuke growled at his older brother when he was finally released, "What the Hell was that for?"

"You're going to get us kicked out if you keep fighting. Now stay here and make up or else" Itachi raised an eyebrow, effectively silencing protests from both parties. He smirked and went back to Neji, calling over his shoulder, "Call me when you're done"

Sasuke glared after him then looked at Naruto, "I am _not _emo"

Naruto glared right back, "You _are _a jerk"

"Shawshank Redemption was a masterpiece"

The blond snorted, "It was a prison movie, what made it so great?"

Sasuke scoffed, "It showed the strengths and frailties of the human spirit! The power and purity of ambition and goodwill! The bond of friendship in the most darkest of places!"

Naruto blinked slowly, "I'm already falling asleep"

"You're an uncultured moron"

* * *

Itachi nodded to Neji as he left his younger brother behind with the blond, "I think there's sexual tension yet" 

The Hyuuga smirked and looked back at the dressing rooms where Gaara still sat, "Whatever you say, you can't even get a college professor to bone you"

Ignoring the insult Itachi tapped his chin, "Speaking of which, we should visit his class"

Neji raised an eyebrow at the randomness, "Why the Hell would we do that?"

Itachi frowned, "well it would be good for us to observe a college class and Orochimaru is our friend and he's a brilliant man, so his class would only be natural"

The Hyuuga rolled his eyes and sighed, "How big is his penis?"

The brunette's friend only looked at the sky and became the perfect vision of a defeated and forlorn puppy, "He thought I was kidding when I asked him"

Neji shook his head, "You always seem so distant and quiet, I often forget what a freak you are"

"Tch, nigra please, there's a wall" Itachi held a hand up in front of Neji's face

The Hyuuga nodded to himself, "I rest my case"

"I hate this shirt"

The pair looked at the redhead who was exiting the dressing room with the shirt on its hanger, "I want something else"

Neji frowned at him, "Then give it to me, I wanted to try it on"

Gaara gave him a look but held on to the shirt, "I want a bell belt" He gestured to his hips, "You know? Something that jingles when I walk"

Neji made a grab for the shirt but the redhead walked away. Itachi smirked at his friend and followed after the other boy, leaving Neji to fume.

They sauntered through the stalls and vendors, Gaara leading the pack as he looked at several random items and demanding that Neji buy them for him. By the time they made it to a vendor that sold belts, Gaara had spent over 80 dollars of Neji's money.

Itachi frowned, ten minutes before he had taken to staring at his phone in annoyance and had been slightly startled when Neji tapped him on the shoulder, "What is it?"

"Where is the ATM? I'm down to 3 dollars" Neji held up his wallet pathetically and Itachi raised an eyebrow, "You brought 150..."

The Hyuuga scowled at him, "Where is it?"

"There's a bank like a block away" Said Itachi, looking back down at his phone with hatred, "You don't suppose he had a change of heart do you?"

Neji shrugged, "If he did I think he would call"

"Maybe he got held up in class" Said Gaara holding an overly large safety pin up under Neji's nose, "It's 2.50, buy it for me"

Itachi glanced up from his phone again, this time to give Gaara a look "He who is greedy is always in want"

Gaara glared at him, "He who finds fortune on his side should go briskly ahead, for she is wont to favor the bold"

The Uchiha stiffened, "… Baltasar Gracian did not say that so you could mooch off Neji"

The redhead only smirked, "yes he did, I'm exactly the guy he said it for"

"You can get more things _after _I go to the ATM" Said Neji, stepping between them and facing Itachi, "Where is it?"

"I'll show you" muttered the Uchiha, putting his phone in his pocket.

* * *

Sasuke and Naruto stepped out of the tent they had entered in a slight attempt at civility. The blond had been dying to see a reenactment of how Frodo, Sam, Merry and Pippin had met the elves. 

Unfortunately for the theatrical veteran Sasuke, it was put on by 7th and 8th graders.

"That was the longest fucking hour of my life! And I've watched half of Corpse Bride!"

They heard a snort behind them, "No one made it half way through Corpse Bride"

The two whirled around and came face to face with Orochimaru.

The man was still in his teaching clothes, though he had lost the jacket and tie, un-tucked the shirt and rolled up his sleeves. He stood with his hands casually in the pockets of his black dress slacks, "But you have to give them credit at least for getting all the dialogue right"

Sasuke shrugged, "hardly a consolation"

Orochimaru only smiled again, "Where's the rest of your group?"

Naruto bristled, "Neji took my Gaara off somewhere and teme's brother went with them"

The older man blinked as Sasuke proceeded to call the blond a moron, "I thought you two were together" He took a step back when two glares hit him full force, "Or am I mistaken?"

"Gross!" Screamed Naruto, "As if me and teme would ever be like that!!"

Sasuke looked as though he were about to yell for a moment as well, but then he just shrugged and looked at his cellphone, "When did you get here?"

"About an hour ago. I actually saw you two walk in there," he gestured to the tent, " So I followed you in but I couldn't see you so I just sat down and watched the show"

"Have you called Itachi?"

"No"

Sasuke nodded and dialed his brother's number, "Come on, let's go find them"

* * *

"Get a 300" said Gaara, poking Neji's side 

"I'm only getting 80" responded the Hyuuga

"I can't get _anything _if you only get 80" scowled Gaara who, by this time, was very used to getting his way with the brunette

"You've gotten plenty of things Gaara" Said Neji, taking the money and his card, "Come on, I'll get you the belt and after that you can just _look_"

Gaara began to pout and Neji continued, "There will be other Ren Faires and Middle Earth festivals"

Itachi jumped as his phone vibrated and he answered, "What is it little brother?"

"Orochimaru is with Naruto and I. Where are you?"

Itachi suppressed a grin, "We're at the bank on 8th street"

"ok"

The line went dead and Itachi slipped his phone into his pocket, "Come on, my brother found Orochimaru"

Neji sighed, "Great, we've only been waiting for like, two hours"

The elder Uchiha only glared at him, "They should be here in a minute, I told Sasuke where we are"

"We know," said Gaara, trying to take Neji's wallet out of his hand, "We were there"

"Shut up you"

0000

((Corvin: I am skipping to the end of the fair, ok? Itachi followed Orochimaru, Neji spent the rest of the day flirting unsuccessfully with Gaara, Naruto and Sasuke argued a lot. Saavy? Wonderful))

Neji leaned against his car, glaring at Itachi who was berating Orochimaru for the tenth time for not wearing a costume.

If the Uchiha would finish then Neji could just take Gaara home already and go explain to his uncle why 250 dollars was missing from his account. Honestly, if he had known Gaara would get so excited about all the over priced, yet nifty, merchandise he would have left his ATM card at home and the matter would not have come up.

He'd keep that in mind.

"I'm hungry, I demand you feed me"

Neji looked at Gaara and raised an eyebrow, "I gotta say, you're a lot more talkative then I would have guessed" He purposely ignored Naruto demanding to know why Gaara would let Neji feed him when the redhead would never accompany him, Naruto, to any meal he invited him out to. (Kyo: That was an awkward sentence)

Gaara shrugged, "Feed me"

"You're going to bankrupt me"

"Tch, I hardly think that will happen from buying me a simple meal"

Neji smirked, "I agree but this meal will be on top of the half of the festival that I bought you"

Gaara leaned against the car next to Neji, "You dragged me out here, you can compensate" He calmly nodded, agreeing with his own logic while Neji rolled his eyes.

"Where would you like to go?"

"I don't know, drive me around until I see somewhere I like"

Naruto, who had been complaining to Sasuke, bounded over to them, "How about ramen?!" He cried happily

Behind him Sasuke made a gagging noise and Neji smirked, "That stuff is so bad for you"

Naruto pouted, "Not the restaurant ramen. It's got real vegetable and meat and noodles… Yup, plenty of nutrients for a growing boy such as myself"

"Please dobe," muttered Sasuke standing beside him, "You're shorter than Sabaku"

Naruto gave him the evil eye but Sasuke ignored him in favor of looking at Neji impatiently, "Can we just ditch my brother? I'm sure he'd kill for a chance to get a ride from the _college professor_"

The Hyuuga grinned at the tone Sasuke used when stressing the last two words, "you know we'd be somewhat scared if he went for someone normal" He gave Sasuke a look, "At least that Kisame guy isn't stalking him anymore"

Sasuke shuddered remembering how the blue, shark man would sneak into their house on Saturdays and rearrange furniture, and the time he shaved his initials into Itachi's cat, "I'll hate you forever for giving him that cat idea"

Neji chuckled while Gaara and Naruto blinked curiously, "anyway, you don't actually have your license, so I doubt Itachi would be happy about you taking his car"

"I hard care what he would be happy about at this point in time" Sasuke nudged Naruto with his elbow, "Come on dobe, I'll take you home"

"You know," said Gaara, "you seem to monopolize him a lot. One would think you're worried he would wander astray"

The Uchiha growled at him and dragged the once again blinking blond towards Itachi's car.

Neji watched in amusement as Sasuke fished the keys out of Itachi's pocket and drove off in his car, while Itachi stared after it shocked, but not wanting to yell obscenities in front of Orochimaru.

Gaara snorted, "This sucks, let's go"

"Alright, alright" Said Neji, taking out his own keys and unlocking the car doors.

* * *

Itachi's eyebrow twitched, though the rest of his face remained calm. He was soooo going to get revenge for this. 

Oh yes, he was going to paste porn all over Sasuke's texts books, then he was going to email all Sasuke's teachers from Sasuke's address and proposition them to have sex, then he was going to shave off one of Sasuke's eyebrows while he slept, the right one would do…

Orochimaru looked at the teen worriedly when he began to grin evilly, "… He took your car"

The Uchiha blinked as if waking up from a wonderful dream and looked at the professor, "Yes… He did. It's fine, I'll just-" He glanced over his shoulder and scowled, Neji had left as well, "Oh I'll kill them"

Orochimaru chuckled, "I'll give you a ride home, come on"

Itachi followed Orochimaru down the block, as parking had been a nightmare, and smirked bemusedly at the dark green truck, "You know… I pictured you as more of a sports car kind of guy"

The other man smiled, "I get that a lot" He unlocked the passenger door and walked around to the driver's side and got in, "I actually don't like sports cars. They're hideous"

Itachi buckled his seatbelt and popped his knuckles, "You think so?"

"They're just so impractical" Orochimaru started the car, but unfortunately had to wait for traffic to clear enough for him to actually get onto the street, "don't have good gas mileage either"

Itachi shrugged and braced himself as Orochimaru swerved out in front of a smaller car. The other driver honked and Orochimaru rolled his eyes, "Hey dick! You're the one going 3 miles an hour! Find your fucking gas pedal if you don't want people cutting you off!"

The Uchiha gaped at him for a full thirty seconds. He hadn't pictured Orochimaru as the type to swear, he had honestly never heard him do it.

Finally noticing his expression Orochimaru glanced at him out of the corner of his eye, "What?"

"Uh, nothing I guess. Take a right up at the light"

Orochimaru switched lanes and grinned, "I have terrible language while driving"

"Road rage?"

"No… Maybe" Orochimaru shrugged, "Only when people are morons"

Itachi opened his mouth to respond when his phone rang. He sighed and pulled it out, "What?"

_"We're going for ice cream," _Came Neji's voice, _"Do you and your lover want to come too?"_

Itachi looked at Orochimaru, "In the mood for ice cream?"

"Sure"

"Which one are you at?" Itachi said into the phone

_"The one on Sunrise"_

"Ok, we'll be there" Itachi hung up and put his phone away, "Do you know where the Cold Stone on Sunrise is?"

"Yeah"

* * *

Cold Stone Creamery, appropriately named in Naruto's opinion seeing as the ice cream was joy-gasmatic. (Botan: As in an orgasm of joy) 

He sat cross legged on his chair, saving a spot with Sasuke at one of the outside tables that were near the door, "so teme, how about them… Eh… What's a movie we'd both agree is good"

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at him, "I hardly think we'd agree on a movie"

Naruto frowned, "Oh come on, we might! Just try and think of one!" The blond crossed his arms and closed his eyes tightly, trying desperately to think of a stuffy, semi-boring movie that Sasuke would like, "… Charlie Chaplin?"

He opened his eyes to see Sasuke gawking at him, "What?"

"You know who Charlie Chaplin is?" The shocked tone took the edge off Naruto's annoyance and he nodded, "So you liiiike…. The Greatest Dictator?"

"Yeah," Sasuke stared at him skeptically, "Are you sure you're not talking about a Mad TV parody or something?"

"You are such a snob!" Exclaimed Naruto, throwing his hands up, "The movie! I mean the black and white movie! You know, 'Hail Hinkle!'" He and Sasuke began to snicker.

As they calmed Naruto grinned at the Uchiha, "You know, when you're not being a total prick you can be a pretty cool guy"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, but the small smile playing on his lips voided the gesture.

* * *

"And chocolate chips, now put on some more coffee ice cream… More chocolate chips… NOT THAT MUCH!" 

Neji sighed, counting out more money while Gaara made several demands of the boy working behind the counter… At least, he was sure it was a boy. The voice was deep, the chest was flat.

Neji shook his head trying not to smile, it amused him so much when he was honestly baffled at someone else's gender. Sometime being mistaken for a girl himself, Neji prided himself on being able to tell the difference.

But really, this 'Haku' person was just ridiculous.

Gaara was finally satisfied and Neji ordered two simple cups of vanilla for Sasuke and Naruto.

Haku smiled prettily and served up the ice cream with more flashy moves then necessary. "Here you go," he said, looking up through his long eyelashes in a most obviously flirting way, "12.95"

Neji held out a ten and a five and Haku took them, still smiling at Neji.

Gaara finally grabbed Neji's arm and yanked him back, "Get your own meal ticket you hermaphrodite" He tugged on Neji's arm again and threw Haku a glare before they went outside to sit down.

* * *

AN: Ok so originally I was going to write more but like……………. Yeah that didn't happen. 

Kyo: Get back in the kitchen woman!

Botan: (to Kyo) get back on the street corner

Corvin: XDD pwned. Anyway, I hope this chapter didn't suck horribly T T I'm trying to get everything updated. -sniff- I forgot to pay my registration fees at school and I was dropped from all my classes. We're going down there tomorrow though to see what we can do.

Kyo: Good luck dearest

Corvin: 3


	5. Chapter 5

Corvin: I'd like to apologize about the quality of this chapter. It is unbetad and uh, I just really wanted to update something.

Botan: You haven't exactly set a high precedent for chapters in this fic... God look at chapter 4.

Corvin: ... shut up.

Kyo: Corvin doesn't own any of the mentioned thingies in this or any other chapters of Literature of the Naïve.

* * *

The dead weekend and newly resurrected weekdays found Naruto jumping as Sasuke once again began laughing. He looked over his shoulder at the girl who had just passed them; she was the third one they'd seen wearing a Twilight T shirt.

"I still don't get why you're laughing." He mumbled as he dug his hands into his orange hoodie, "it's kind of creeping me out."

"I'm allowed to be happy," replied Sasuke mirthfully, "and I can't help it if I instinctively laugh at the biggest joke of an American franchise since Pirates of the Caribbean…" Sasuke frowned, "maybe I'm being too hard on Pirates of the Caribbean."

"And I still don't get why you're following me around!" At first Naruto hadn't minded the fact that Sasuke seemed to be glued to his side. In fact, he enjoyed the company. But the Uchiha's snobbery reached an extent that Naruto had never seen in another human being.

Mirth gone Sasuke scowled, "I'm not following you around."

It was a feeble thing to say seeing as the day was half over and Sasuke had been waiting outside every one of Naruto's classes to walk him to the next. They were on their way to the cafeteria when the T shirts came into view.

Naruto shrugged, "sure you're not. By the way, I watched Shawshank Redemption last night."

"Oh?"

"Yeah…I think you were wrong."

Sasuke scowled more, "oh?"

Naruto nodded, "I don't think it was so much about friendship… I mean, Andy was talking a lot about hope and I think everything he did was an example that he never, err, gave up his hope. You know?" He sheepishly dug his hands further into his pockets.

A look of blank, disbelieving shock seized Sasuke's face. "You…" He stared at Naruto, as if seeing him for the first time, "…you…understood something." He cupped Naruto's reddening face, "did it hurt?"

"Get off of me!!" Naruto shoved him back, "you're such a bastard!"

"Trouble in paradise little brother?"

Sasuke looked over his shoulder at Itachi and Neji who had just come out of the bathroom. He was about to respond when he noticed an absence, "where's Gaara?"

Neji frowned, "we haven't seen him today. I thought he'd be with you." He looked around the crowds of people, fighting like a group of hyenas for food.

"No one cares were 'red' is," said Itachi, "as I've been saying to Neji: That rat-bastard hasn't called me!"

Naruto blinked, "…since day before yesterday?"

"Yeah."

"You're a psychopath," deadpanned Sasuke, "now go away."

"No can do little brother," Itachi tried to ruffle Sasuke's hair unsuccessfully due to the copious amounts of hair gel, "if I allow you to feel too much joy a day you get uppity."

Sasuke shoved Itachi's hand away and looked at Neji, "did you check the library?"

"Yes, he's not in there."

"Did you check the back corner?"

Neji frowned, "we checked all over the library, he isn't in there." He elbowed Itachi who was wiping his hand on Neji's button up shirt, "…why? Did you see him in there?"

"Well, in the back corner if you move all the books on the bottom shelf you can crawl behind the shelf and there's a space with a ladder that goes into an attic or crawl space or whatever it's called." Sasuke gripped Naruto's elbow as he tried to sprint off to the library. "Didn't you know about it?"

"…shut up Scooter." Neji turned and began pressing his way through the bodies of hungry students.

Sasuke looked after him, "Scooter?"

"That is so your nickname." Itachi snickered, "come with me to the computer lab."

"I want food," replied Sasuke, "go to the computer lab and be creepy by yourself." He tugged on Naruto's arm, "come on stupid."

"Don't call me that you bastard!"

Itachi's face went passive, "foolish little brother." He said in a soft, dangerous voice that Sasuke knew well, "You will accompany me to get food and then you will go to the computer lab." He stared at the squirming Naruto until he fell still, "and you will come along too." He swept past them as orgy of fodder-eaters made a path for him.

Naruto blinked, "…I'm starting to kind of get why you are the way you are."

Sasuke scowled, "shut up and let's go."

* * *

Neji was assaulted by the smell of old books, new books and body odor coming off the people that had nothing better to do than sit in the library and somehow when it was twenty below zero in the God-forsaken tome dumpster.

He nodded to the librarian, a short man with a pointed noise and little chin who resembled one of Dr. Seuss's drawings. "Excuse me, but have you seen a redhead? Yay high," he held his hand up shoulder level, "green eyes with a lot of makeup?"

"I believe so," said Mr. Who, "he was in here a little while ago in the historical fiction section…" He pointed towards a series of shelves in the back corner that Sasuke had spoken of.

"Thanks."

Obviously the library needed a bit of work. The smell of dampness hung in the air, probably due to the fact that no one had closed the window over the weekend and dew got onto the books and carpet. The carpet was at least twenty years old and the once dark but now fading blue somehow made the shabbiness of the shelves stand out more.

All in all it was depressing to look at. Neji so much more preferred the public library near his house. With its polished shelves, burgundy carpet and the smell of Glade plug-ins; Iruka, the librarian there, took pride in his job and really went the extra-mile. That library would probably be Neji's favorite place in the world if it wasn't for the creepy guy with silver hair who was always there either sitting down reading a book that Iruka definitely did not stalk, or bothering Iruka himself.

Poor Iruka; if he didn't blush so easily he wouldn't be such a target.

Neji kneeled down and peered over the books as best he could, it was solid wood behind them. Frowning he leaned further down began removing the books from the bottom shelf. "Well fuck me and call me Sally." There wasn't any wood behind these books. Although… That was one small hole. Neji snorted, 'that's what she said.'

After pausing a moment to appropriately hate himself for being twelve, Neji moved the rest of the books on the shelf and stacked them out of the way.

At first he had thought that the backboard had simply stopped before the bottom. But with a clear view it seemed that someone had gone through the trouble of removing it. Neji unbuttoned his shirt and slid it off his shoulders so that it trapped his hair underneath so that it wouldn't get caught on the frayed wood.

He got onto his stomach and soldier crawled through the small opening, only to have to turn onto his back so that he could sit up. The space between the shelf and the wall was only about three feet long and two feet wide. There was just enough space for him to fit if he bent his long legs through the opening and pulled himself up on the ladder.

As he pulled his hair out of his shirt, Neji realized in horror that he was probably too big to fit back through the hole once he found Gaara. "Damn, stupid, anorexic-"

"Someone I know?"

He looked up and saw Gaara leaning out of the square hole in the wall. "What are you doing in here?"

Gaara shrugged, "I felt like being alone. How did you find me?"

"Sasuke saw you in here a while ago." Neji frowned, "he's been hanging out with Naruto all day." At first he had been grateful that Sasuke was keeping the blond busy and away from Gaara, but honestly Neji wasn't sure if it was worth having the bundle of sunshine and seizures that came with every visit with the younger Uchiha.

"Oh." Gaara leaned back onto the space and Neji climbed up the ladder, only to find Gaara sitting at the entrance with a book in his lap. Behind him was a window that let in some light from outside.

"Where does that go?"

Gaara looked over his shoulder at the window, "out to the roof," he said, "I don't think there's anyone at this school that's small enough to go back out the bookshelf."

"Right."

"Go away."

Neji tried to shove Gaara out of his way, "you're blocking the exit." But Gaara didn't budge. "Fine, I'll stay." He left his hand on Gaara's thigh, "what are you reading?"

"A Wrinkle in Time."

"Really?" Neji climbed further up on the ladder and leaned forward to rest his chin on Gaara's shoulder. "You haven't read it before?"

"Nope." If he was bothered by Neji's close proximity, he didn't show it. "Orochimaru recommended it when I told him I'd never heard of it."

"Ah," Neji scowled, "when did he get your number?"

"When I gave it to him last night," Gaara folded his page and closed his book, "he called me last night because he wanted to know if I took his money when I borrowed his coat."

"Did you?"

"Yes. Anyway, from there we just started talking about things." Finally beginning to feel crowded, Gaara scooted away from the opening so that Neji would have room to sit down. Unfortunately, it was too small for him to keep his back straight and the significantly taller Hyuuga had to crane his neck uncomfortably. Gaara didn't seem to care. "And somewhere in there he asked if I read this book—ah, we were talking about time travel and he made a reference to the tesseract. Anyway, I said I hadn't and he said I should."

"Huh."

"Yep."

Neji sat there, waiting for Gaara to do something else but the redhead merely reopened his book and began reading. Silence reigned for about three minutes while Neji's annoyance began to build. "Hey, let me past, I'm going to go see what Sasuke and Naruto are up to."

Gaara looked put-out, "I'll move when I feel like it."

"I'm hungry too and lunch is going to end." Neji started pushing Gaara's side. Now that he was on the same level he was stronger and able to push the uncooperative Gaara all the way down to the window.

"I could kick your ass for that." Gaara growled, even though he didn't look very threatening when he was curled up and pushed against glass.

In fact, he looked rather adorable.

Neji repressed a smirk. An enclosed space, plenty of privacy, Gaara so very, very close… Well bless Neji's nippers this was the perfect time to make a move.

"GAARA!!!"

Oh fucking shit, Neji hated Naruto so much.

"We might as well go now. Hopefully that idiot won't give this place away." Gaara's words seemed particularly venomous as he pushed the window open and climbed out onto the roof. "Come on, there's a place we can climb down over here."

How was it that Gaara had been at school not even a year and already he knew of places Neji, a student of three years thus far, did not?

They crossed the white roof, staying low so as not to be seen. Sure enough, on the far side, up against the main building, was a good size planter box that they could drop safely onto.

Neji jumped down first, stumbling slightly as he accidentally landed on loose dirt. He turned around and held his arms up to Gaara, "I'll help you down."

"I don't need help," Gaara said stubbornly, "I've done this before."

"Humor me."

Gaara remained still a moment longer before he shrugged and jumped gracelessly into Neji's arms. Neji caught him around the waist and held him fast so that his face was level with Gaara's neck. Gaara's hands were resting on his shoulders awkwardly, "you can put me down; now."

"Aha!"

Either Naruto had gotten Sasuke and himself thrown out of the library or Sasuke had seen fit to disclose where the exit of the secret hole let out. Both scenarios were highly inconvenient for Neji.

The vociferous, golden haired youth that would easily out-cry a flock of seagulls forced his way between them and turned on Neji, "rapist!"

Neji merely raised an eyebrow and at Sasuke, "what's good?"

"Not much." Sasuke was contented to skulk outside the planter with his hands in his pockets and a scowl on his brow, "Itachi skived off to go crash one of Orochimaru's classes."

"I'm not surprised." Neji said dryly, "he didn't make you go?"

"No," Sasuke shivered in disgust, "he said he wanted alone time"

"I'M STILL HERE YOU KNOW!" Naruto prodded Neji's chest with a cold, hard finger of accusation, "stop sneaking off with Gaara!"

"Did you sneak off?" Gaara asked around Naruto.

Neji shook his head, "actually I recall announcing where I was going and what my plans were."

"He did," affirmed Sasuke, "I heard him."

Naruto glared at Sasuke but his anger dissipated as he looked at Gaara, "let's go get some food."

"Actually," Neji wrapped his arm around Naruto's shoulders in a gesture of false camaraderie, "how about you go with Sasuke to do something far away." He led the blond back to Sasuke's side and released him, "Right Sasuke?"

"Whatever." Despite the snappish tone, Sasuke didn't seem very displeased.

Suddenly, Neji's head was yanked back. Gaara was holding onto the end of his hair, "I want a brownie."

"That's not the way to ask for it." Neji shook his hair free and faced Gaara with a smirk, "beg for one."

"That's my queue to exit." Sasuke grabbed Naruto's hand and led him away, ignoring the blond's protests.

Neji grinned and slyly took Gaara's hand, "let's hear some begging."

Gaara responded by punching him in the stomach.

* * *

"He talks down to us."

Neji jumped and nearly fell out of his seat. After getting hit in the stomach by boy who he had forgotten was temperamental, Neji had shuffled to his class. He had spent the next two periods nursing his wounded pride and bruised tummy. He glared at Itachi who was sitting next to him and looking somewhat put out. "What?"

"Orochimaru," hissed Itachi, "I was in his class. You know how he talks around us?"

"… Uh, yeah."

"He is way better-spoken than he is around us! He doesn't think we'd be able to meet him on his level!"

Neji raised an eyebrow, "well, you are standing up in the middle of class, yelling."

"Itachi," the teacher said with barely contained rage, "please go back to your own class."

"Get bent Ms. Anko," Itachi brushed her off and nudged Neji's shoulder, "now come on Neji, we have to sneak into his house and rearrange his furniture."

"After you get out of detention?"

"Yes." Itachi casually took his pink detention slip and ducked under the piece of chalk Ms. Anko threw at him.

"… Psycho."

Who he was actually referring to was unclear.

* * *

Corvin: Hawh, wow, over four months since my last update. But I am working like a madman.

Botan: Her grades can attest to that.

Kyo: As can her grooming. Hey bitch! Brush your hair!

Corvin: Stop it you wretched muses! Why don't you help me write a little better!

Botan: Anyhoo, uh... bye.

Corvin, Kyo: Byyye!


	6. Chapter 6

Corvin: Warning! Use of OC.

Kyo: Stop using those.

Corvin: You're an OC. Dummy.

Kyo: You're a whore.

Botan: Get to the updating.

* * *

"This is easily one of the most stupid ideas you've ever had."

"Deal with it."

"What's going on?"

Neji and Itachi jumped and whirled around to see a bemused Orochimaru standing in the doorway. The boy on the couch made a noise and began to struggle. Itachi tried to stand in front of him but it was too late and the boy fell.

Orochimaru raised an eyebrow and Neji pointed to the Uchiha, "it was all his idea."

"I see," he looked around the room, "where is all my furniture?"

Itachi hooked his thumbs in his pockets and swayed somewhat sheepishly, "upstairs."

"Why?"

"Long story?"

Another sound, this time very indignant, drew their eyes back to the young boy on the floor.

"Why don't you start from the beginning?" Orochimaru suggested, pocketing his keys, "**while**you untie my son."

((Flashback))

"It's stupid." Neji deadpanned.

"But not as stupid as some of the ideas I've had."

"I'll confirm or deny that later." He glared at the sliding glass door in front of him.

After being (regrettably) dragged away from Gaara after school, Neji was forced into his friend's car and driven across town. Fifteen minutes, four near misses with disgruntled looking drivers and three songs of Itachi's bad singing later they stood on the teacher's dorm at the college campus Orochimaru taught at.

"I'm not going to bother asking why you know where he lives."

"He told me."

Neji raised an eyebrow, "did you ask like a normal person? Or did he tell you by going home while you were hiding in his car?"

"Neji, my friend," Itachi fished in his pocket and pulled out a paperclip, "don't act like following someone home is such a weird thing anymore. It makes you seem ignorant."

"I'll dismiss the crazy person talk for now." Neji leaned against the door and crossed his arms, "I didn't know you could pick a lock."

"I assumed I could." Itachi put more weight on the door only to stumble when it slid open. "…I'm a genius."

He stood up and brushed off his pants, "come along Hyuuga." He grabbed Neji's sleeve and pulled him inside.

The furnishings were light so it didn't take them long to move the couch into the bedroom. One of the two beds of the bedroom to the kitchen and the kitchen table upside down where the TV usually went.

"Neji! Open the door for me."

"In the bathroom? That's cruel."

"Do it, man."

"Fine, but make sure you don't break it."

"You're just jealous."

"Of what?"

The sound of the back door sliding open was barely audible over their voices but they heard it. They immediately fell silent and the noise was followed by footsteps and an adolescent voice. "What the Hell?"

Neji and Itachi remained perfectly still in the doorway of the bathroom. After a moment of silence a boy appeared from the kitchen.

He didn't actually notice them until Itachi gasped.

"Who the-"

"GET HIM!"

((End Flashback))

"After that we tied him up and shoved one of his socks in his mouth." Itachi pulled his hands out of his pocket but continued to sway, "hence the fact that he only has one shoe on."

"I only wish I could say that this was the first time this has happened." The boy rubbed his jaw.

"Yeah, sorry about that," Neji helped the boy sit up and patted him on the back.

"Uh huh," Orochimaru stood over them and held out his hand to help them both up. "Are you ok, Ichigo?"

"It's still better than the shame bucket." Ichigo glanced at Neji and Itachi briefly before he disappeared into the bedroom.

"So…" Neji waved his arm in the direction of the shut door, "who was that and why does he look like you?"

"That is my son, Ichigo, and… genetics." Orochimaru crossed his arms again and looked around. "Did you do this to my furniture?"

Itachi stopped swaying, "yes. Yes we did. And do you know why we did it?" His voice grew angrier with each word.

"…You're drunk?"

"I may be somewhat above the legal limit, but no."

Neji blinked and frowned at Itachi but he went ignored.

"I snuck into your class-"

"You announced yourself with a British accent."

"-And what did I hear?"

"My lecture, I'd imagine."

"YOU'VE BLOODY BEEN TALKING DOWN TO US!" The English accent left much to be desired.

Neji began to sidle out of the room. He'd become rather desensitized to Itachi's antics, but this time it was just a bit too embarrassing. Gaara was probably already home by then and would be too settled in to want to do anything.

"Now what's this about you having a son?"

"I think you're more than slightly above the legal limit." Orochimaru leaned back as the Uchiha invaded his space and made strange hissing sounds.

"Who's his mom, huh?"

"I don't think you'd know her."

"Itachi," Neji hissed, "let's just leave."

Orochimaru raised an eyebrow, "you can leave after you've cleaned up this mess."

"Sure, sure," Itachi, having miraculously calmed down, waved the words away. "But seriously, who is that person's mother?"

"Her name is Anko, but we-"

Itachi turned on his heel and walked out the back door. Neji and Orochimaru stared after him, one in annoyance and the other in shock. A minute later they heard the sound of a car starting and driving away. It wasn't until about a minute later when Neji sneezed that Orochimaru continued, "-got a divorce."

"…Mitarashi Anko?"

"Yes." Orochimaru looked at the Hyuuga, "do you know her?"

"She's my teacher." Neji blinked away a grimace. He'd never be able to look at her the same way again.

"Huh…"

"… Well… I suppose I best be hittin' the ol' dusty trail," Neji moved towards the door but Orochimaru grabbed his shoulder and held him in place.

"Oh no you don't. Furniture first."

"…" Neji scowled and pulled out his phone, "fine, just give me one second.

* * *

An hour and a half later Neji reached Gaara's house and smiled when he saw the redhead reading on his front porch.

He parked on the street and got out of his car. "I'm glad you got my text." He called as he approached the house.

Gaara looked up at him and quirked a brow, "your what?"

"...My text."

"I don't get texting," Gaara looked back down at his book.

"...Oh..." Neji took his hands out of his pockets and sat down on the cement, "then what are you doing out here?"

"My brother is too loud and my sister is trying to make me eat." He turned a page.

"I see…" Neji ran a hand through his hair and pushed it back over his shoulder. "Do you want to come to the movies with me?" He received an annoyed look but he continued anyway. "Sasuke is going to see one later and I thought I'd tag along. You should come too."

"What about the older one?"

"Itachi?"

"I don't like being around both of them at the same time." Gaara shivered and turned a page for too quickly for him to have finished reading it. "His brother complex creeps me out."

Neji shook his head, "I don't think he has a brother complex."

"Oh yes he does."

"…Anyway, Itachi is still freaking out about what we found at Orochimaru's place." He leaned in conspiratorially, "apparently he has a son."

"I know, Ichigo."

"You do?" Neji blinked, "since when are you and Orochimaru best friends?"

"We were on the phone for a long time," Gaara closed the book, "did you want something?"

Neji smiled and put his hand on Gaara's knee, "the movies, like I just said." He bit his lip when the redhead's blunt nails dug into his knuckles.

"I get snacks?" From his face one would think Gaara was not in the process of breaking the poor Hyuuga's hand.

"S-sure."

Once Gaara removed his hand, Neji recovered enough to ask, "if you're out here to avoid eating, why do you want snacks?"

"It's not eating I'm avoiding." Gaara closed his book and shuddered, "it's her cooking."

"She can't cook?"

"She can, she just chooses the most grotesque things."

Neji blinked, "like what?"

"Eggs," Gaara deadpanned.

* * *

"GAARA!!"

"You didn't tell me he'd be here." Gaara glared up at Neji, "you're going to pay for this."

"I didn't know either," Neji sniffed defensively. "Hey, Sasuke," he glared at the Uchiha, "you didn't tell me Orange McGee was going to be here."

"Don't get all pissed off at me," Naruto grumbled, "the bastard dragged me out here and promised to buy my ticket."

Neji's annoyance melted away and he looked at Sasuke with a carefully blank face, "did you now?"

"Shut up," Sasuke growled. He grabbed Naruto by the wrist and began dragging him inside, "we'll save you seats," he snapped over his shoulder.

"Do we have to sit with them?" Gaara looked up at Neji who nodded, "if they're saving us seats."

After paying for the tickets and buying the redhead around thirty dollars worth of snacks, Neji led Gaara into the darkening room.

"You just made it," Sasuke sidled through the other patrons' legs to get to them, "the previews just started. C'mon."

After sliding past a few people who seemed dead set on keeping their legs where they were, Neji settled next to Naruto with Gaara sandwiched between himself and a stranger with a large tub of week old popcorn.

Twenty minutes into the movie Neji wished he'd sat next to Sasuke. At least with his sarcastic friend there would be some witty commentary to distract him from the stiff acting and poorly written dialogue.

He scowled when he heard the quiet murmur of Sasuke's voice followed by a snort from Naruto.

Another painful fifteen minutes of an angsty female lead with rabbit dentures and one borderline catatonic facial expression and he couldn't take it anymore.

"Hey, I need to get by." Naruto stood up while nudging him.

Neji rolled his eyes and started to tuck his legs back before he changed his mind. "I'm going too."

He and Naruto sidled out.

"I can't believe Sasuke is willingly watching this movie."

"Believe it," Naruto grinned.

"Somehow hearing you say that phrase makes me want to kill a puppy." Neji glared at the poster on the wall that was advertising the movie they'd just walked out of. "…Are you doing the potty dance?"

"I have to pee really bad."

"Dance away." He leaned against the wall outside the bathroom while waiting for Naruto.

It was easy to zone while staring at the posters on the wall. He was so far gone that he jumped when Naruto slung an arm around his shoulder, "Aaaah, sweet relief."

"I hope you washed your hands." Neji glared at him, "or I really will kill that puppy."

Naruto laughed, "I gotta say man, you're a lot different than I thought you'd be."

"Oh really?" Neji raised an eyebrow. "What did you think I'd be like?"

"An unlikeable, self-righteous prick," Naruto smiled brightly at a staring passerby. Neji was reminded that they were standing outside the men's room with Naruto's arm around him.

He shrugged, "so how am I different?"

"Well," Naruto returned the shrug, "you're not _so _unlikeable."

"Oh? Does that mean I'm forgiven for stealing Gaara?"

"Pssh, whatever, you haven't stolen anything." Naruto's arm tightened to an almost headlock but Neji persisted.

"Oh right, because you never had him." He smirked, "not like you have Sasuke."

"Naruto turned away, finally removing his arm and coughed, "don't know what you're talking about."

"I bet." Neji crossed his arms and leaned into Naruto's face, "have you two been naughty yet?"

Naruto turned red, "what?! I- no! What the fu—dude!" He leaned back, "you're being creepy. We just friends, like, good friends, like, brothers."

"No you're not. If you were like brothers he'd hate your guts and slip tuna into your pillow case."

"Tuna?"

"Tuna."

"What the Hell are you doing?"

They both jumped and looked around. Gaara was standing a few feet away, glaring at them.

"Uh, I'm gonna go…" Naruto moved away from Neji and around Gaara. The redhead's eyes followed him until he disappeared into the viewing room. Then he looked at Neji, "you disappeared for ten minutes."

"That will happen, it's a shitty movie."

"No to vampires?"

"Tinkerbelle isn't a vampire." Neji tilted his head to the side, "what's up?"

Gaara took three steps forward and grabbed his wrist, "come on." Neji blinked as he was pulled through the lobby and out the doors into the parking lot.

"What are you doing?" He didn't mind missing the rest of the film abomination and he was rather enjoying the fact that Gaara was expressing a desire to be alone but…but… He forgot where he was going with that. "Gaara-"

"Look I already know what's going on. It's obvious you idiot." Gaara finally stopped next to Neji's car and he leaned against it.

Neji blinked, "what is?"

"You." Gaara crossed his arms and looked back at the theater, "You like Naruto."

"...What?"

"But you know what? He's with Sasuke, so you should give up on him. They've already fooled around."

Neji stared at him in shock and horror both at the thought of being with Naruto and then Sasuke actually being with Naruto.

"Ok? So...so you should give me a chance." Gaara glanced up at Neji quickly before scowling and letting his eyes wander over the parking lot.

"I… What?" Neji tried to take in everything that was going on, but his mind was still running slowly from the traumatizing thought of him and Naruto being together. He prided himself on being a smart person, Hell a genius even, but he couldn't understand how after going through everything he went through, this had been the outcome.

His mouth was hanging open, his brows knitted in bewilderment as he searched his vocabulary for the words to accurately and conclusively convey both the truth and his disgust at the very notion of himself with Naruto.

However, Gaara spoke first. "Look, I know you like Naruto and I'm so…not Naruto, but-" He growled, "God, stop making that face!" He stepped forward and shoved Neji into the car next to them. "If you think it's such a bad idea just say so. You don't have to be an asshole!"

Neji held his hands up. "Calm down." When he saw that Gaara was opening his mouth, he straightened up and put his hands on the redhead's shoulders. "Gaara, really, just give me a second."

It worked and continued to do so for a few minutes of painfully awkward silence before Neji spoke again.

"Ok first: Ew." Gaara looked as though he'd been slapped but Neji kept going, "Naruto is a ham-beast. Ok? So no, just no," he shook his head slowly until Gaara unconsciously began copying the motion.

Satisfied Neji removed his hands, "second: Good God man, what would even give you that idea?"

"Well, you just randomly started hanging around all the time."

"Uh huh."

"And you started talking to me."

Neji frowned, "how does that translate?"

"You want to use me to get close to him."

"That's…incredibly paranoid." Neji cringed, "no, it's you."

Gaara tilted his head to the side. "What do you mean?"

"I've been trying to get with you. I've been trying pretty hard actually! I've been giving you things, flirting with you, taking you places… I've done everything I know how to do short of bending you over!" His frustration began to manifest in the form of pacing.

"Wow," Gaara eyed him, "you're pretty socially retarded."

Neji froze and pressed his lips together. He wasn't even going to dignify that with a response.

"I'll make this easy for you." Gaara touched Neji's arm. "Kiss me."

* * *

Corvin: Fina-fucking-lly!! Only the epilogue left and I'm finished.

Kyo: How long has it been since you finished a fic?

Corvin: I don't even remember ; 3;

Botan: I'm bored. Go work on something else.

Corvin: Don't tell me how to live my life!!

Botan: Corvin, you're a woman, you're lucky I'm letting you look me in the eye right now. Get to writing.

Kyo: I love you.


	7. Chapter 7

"Would you two stop making out!!" Sasuke threw his shoulder against his bedroom door, "or at least do it at your own damn house!"

"For your information," Gaara said from inside, "we're trying to fuck." The statement was followed by Neji chuckled and the rustling of clothes followed.

"…I need a mind altering substance."

Naruto followed a now green tinted Sasuke down the hall towards the kitchen. On the way they passed an open door. Itachi was sitting on a bed in the room holding his cellphone to his ear with this shoulder why he fiddled with an old GameBoy Color.

The phone rang twice before someone answered. _"Hello?" _

"Hey, this is Itachi."

_"… Are you one of the people who tied me up?" _

"Hawh, yeah. Hey put Orochimaru on the phone."

_"Why do you want to talk to my dad? Aren't you my age?" _

**"Who is it?" **

_"It's that guy that smelled like angst and overcompensation. Here." _

**"Hello Itachi." **

"…Hey. How's it going? Sorry about walking out before."

Orochimaru laughed. **"It's fine, Neji helped moved everything back where it went."**

"Yeah, he does that." Itachi dropped the GameBoy on the bed, "hey."

**"Hm?" **

"Will you fuck me?"

**"…What?" **

* * *

-THE END-

Corvin: Oh my gosh I'm finally done!

Kyo: This ending is worse than Dark Diary.

Corvin: No ending is worse than Dark Diary.

Botan: You couldn't have just put that in the final chapter?

Corvin: I fancied Itachi deserved his own scene. Well peeps! I finally finished another one!

Kyo: And just in time for your five year anniversary!

Botan: Break out the booze!

Corvin: It's true. Oh wow, who could believe that exactly five years ago tomorrow I first joined FFN? I feel so old.

Botan: You look old.

Corvin: I DO NOT!

Kyo: Yeah! She looks like the same bitter, lonely virgin she always did!

Corvin: …

Botan: This note is getting too long. I'm ending it now.

Corvin: Bye loves! Thanks for reading!


End file.
